This small flower surrounded by such carnage, searching only for one more light... one more small indication that this was not all there was to be known. She wanted nothing more than to have proof of something more, and to see that she was not wrong. But left there after so many prayers and pleadings... cold and lonely nights with no response... she had no belief left that there could be more. She wanted to believe... but her heart, bruised and shivering, no longer wanted to be wrong. It was no more the sadness of seeing this, her changeless world, than it was the fear of never finding any more than what she had always found. She no longer had the will to look.
With her petals fixed and her face darkened, she refused to believe that anything could or had changed... and there she remained, weakening to the darkness, being swallowed body and soul, further and further each passing day.
There arose a flicker within her thoughts... "What may be out there? What might I see if I was to glance? Is there a chance?" And the flicker was fought...
The words were so deeply engrained, "What if there's nothing, can you stand more pain? Do you really want to open your petals again?"
Her reply for so long remained the same... "I'll stay."
The darkness had engulfed her being, and she was darkness from without to within...
Until one day, it changed. She fought the raging battle within with a fire she had not known before.
"what if there really is more? What if it's something I can create? What if my fate is truly my fate?"
And with that blazing crown of strength, she chose to awake.
----
I have tasted what more there is... and I know that there is more. I am sitting directly in this elusive "more" right now. I can see so many rays of light all around me that I never again could believe there is only darkness to surround me. But this story is not ready to be finished quite yet... It will be continued. :)
